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__ Sunday, October 30, 2005 ;

Went to church with Karen yesterday to meet Cynthia at 4pm. Oh man... there was a wedding in the morning. Wonder who is the blessed couple. *envious*.. hahas... Anyway, we went for the e_God@1630 service by Pastor Shih Ming. That was a really different experience for me. The service was so different from the Sunday one man. I enjoyed it man... Hees... Going for the Saturday one next week too. After the service, Cynthia brought us to the PCM group lo. Quite fun lahz except for the fact that we were the youngest among them. Oh man... one of them is even married le lahz... hahas... And the speaker is damn lame lahz. Kept laughing and I don't even know what's the joke about.. diaoz... But he's entertaining... lols...

Oh man... there's Mother Tongue A level examinations tomorrow and I've not studied for it man. Don't feel like doing chinese lah... Anyway the minimum grade for uni admission is D7 only... Seriously hope I can get at least a C5 lahz... *prays*... And there isn't anything to study anyway... Whatever lahz....

Oh well, I'm so lethargic my eyes are closing soon sia.. Hope I won't fall asleep in church later
-_-"... hahas... Gotta go church now... till then.

made another new promise ][-
 and broke it again at 9:16 AM ;

 

__ Wednesday, October 26, 2005 ;

Went to school for 1 hour only and then left to meet Karen and Theresa to watch Flightplan. Darnz... The ending was so anti-climax lor... It wasn't worth the money man. After that, went to Boon Lay shopping complex to meet Xian Hui at the comic shop. Wonder what is so attractive about those comics... hahas... Anyway, had a hard time because I skipped school man. Met Ms Tan (GP tutor) at Jurong Point's NTUC lo. Scare the hell out of me when she called my name. Then saw Mdm Liu Fen at the bus stop sia... diaoz... Singapore is really small...

Oh yah, seriously have to thank God for allowing me to be promoted man. I thank Him for giving me another chance to start afresh and work harder next year. Have to buck up during the holidays and catch up with all my J1 work lahz... Cannot slack again...

Hee...I'm so happy! School is ending this week le. Finally... I've been waiting so long for this week to arrive. hahas... I've lots of activities during this holiday manz.
1) MT AO exam
2) Oral Presentation
3) Insights and Reflections
4) Holiday Job
5) Superstar Virgo
6) Interact Camp (most likely not attending lahz..)
7) Econs tuition
8) Kick that bloody maid back to Indonesia
9) Catch up with J1 work
10) Hair cut
11) New clothes
12) Christmas celebrations!

Have to go prepare for my oral presentation le. Till then...

It's been 4 months,
and I'm still missing you.
How has life been for you?
Hope you're doing fine.
8 more months left...
I'll wait...

made another new promise ][-
 and broke it again at 7:31 PM ;

 

__ Sunday, October 23, 2005 ;

I'm a happier person now. So I'm back! hahas... Went to church in the morning. Pastor Shih Ming spoke about our workload. Here's 3 important points I learnt today.
1) Get in touch with the real reasons for overwork
2) Beware of the consequences of overwork
3) Create a life where work works for you

I don't think it's relevant to me anyway cuz I'm slacking most of the time and it's very rarely that I'll be overworked. hahas... Hm.. Went for lunch with Karen and Cynthia (whom I just met few hrs ago) after the service. The Zhu Chang Fen sucked lo. Gave me so much oil and the sauce was tasteless man. Gave up eating after a few mouths. It was gross lahz. I'm so hungry now sia... wah lao. -_-"

Hm.. I'm so happy! Can't wait to go for cruise with Xian Hui and Karen. Hees... for more details, go see XianHui's blog. I'm lazy to write lahz... I sincerely thank God for this golden opportunity to relax and have fun with my friends! Pray that nothing will happen which will affect our trip. I hope I'll have the opportunity to go on a Mission Trip some day too. It has always been my dream man. I want to go to South Africa to visit the Kong Bushmen...hahas...

School is starting tomorrow again. I can't help but feel a sense of resentment again. I hate going to school so much lahz. But I have to be strong and perservere. Like what Pastor ShihMing said today, "go to your old job as a new person". I will try my best to change my attitude towards going to school and be a better person. Afterall, it's the last week of school le. I am so happy lahz... Finally holidays are arriving. But I'll have to sit for Chinese AO exams first. Didn't really study much for it man. Just hope that I'll get a pleasant looking grade lahz.

Am meeting my primary school friends tomorrow for dinner. So excited. Wonder how they look like now after so many years. hees... gtg now.. till then!

Worthy is the Lamb,
seated on the throne.
Crown you now with many crowns,
You reign victorious.
High and lifted up,
Jesus Son of God.
The darling of Heaven crucified,
Worthy is the Lamb.

made another new promise ][-
 and broke it again at 2:54 PM ;

 

__ Friday, October 14, 2005 ;

I feel so empty inside me. Seriously, I hate JC life. I don't even think I have a life currently. Everyday revolves around homework and exams. I feel so stressed up and depressed. Cut again.. I know I should stop it, I know it's a sin that God frowns upon, but I really am going to break down soon if I don't do it. At least, I can relieve some part of my stress and burden. I feel like giving up now. I hate this kind of life. I hate it when I have to drag my feet every morning to school. I hate it when I have to find all sorts of excuses just to be able to skip school. I hate it when I have to face the consequences of my badly done results. I hate it! I can't stand it anymore. Can't I return to the past? I used to love school so much... I loved studying, I loved interacting with people, and I loved myself. But now, I'm a totally different person. I don't even feel like speaking to anyone. Why have things turned out this way? Have I done anything wrong? Why is God torturing me like that?

Please come back... I miss you so much. I really do...

made another new promise ][-
 and broke it again at 6:38 PM ;

 

__ Monday, October 10, 2005 ;

I want to die. God must have hated me a lot. I've really put in a lot of efforts for the exam and yet I got such disgusting grades. I have no courage to face the world anymore. I don't want to retain. Haish... Went to meet my Pastor at the church after school. Felt slightly better after talking to him lahz. Really have to thank him man. If not for him, I think I really will go and kill myself. What the hell... Argh! I don't even know whether I can go for the Australia trip with such lousy results of mine. I'm so disappointed. Haish...

Wah lao... Don't feel like blogging le lahz. Till then.

made another new promise ][-
 and broke it again at 6:37 PM ;

 

__ Friday, October 07, 2005 ;

Should I go?
Or should I give up the chance?

I really want to go to the Australia trip. After all, that's the only reason why I'm in JJ in the first place. But somehow, I feel a little hesitant now. I don't know why. Argh...

Anyway, went shopping today with Theresa and Xian Hui. Reached CityLink at around 10am bahz but most of the shops weren't open lo. Sianz diao. Ate breakfast at TCC then went Kbox. Actually can sing only 2 hrs de but the person allowed us to sing for 4 hrs lo. Shuang man... And the Lemon Tea was great. Drank 3 cups in the end...ahas...After KBox, we went to Suntec and Marina walk around lo. Visited the Body Shop Sale but I didn't buy anything lahz...Was on budget mahz. Wanted to buy clothes de but didn't see any nice one. Sianz diao. I don't know what to wear to church on Sunday.

Then yesterday went to watch The Myth after Econs paper. Wah...damn nice man. The scenery, the song, the action parts all very nice sia. Kim Hee Sun is so pretty also wor... No wonder people call her Korea's 1st beauty...hahas... Was already 9.30pm when the show ended. Fell asleep on the bus and I ended up in Clementi lo. Wah lao... Had to take a bus back home... diaoz...

Oh well, exams have ended. This means that lessons are going to start again. Argh... I feel the urge to skip school again. Gotta enjoy as much as I can during this weekend. Going Causeway tomorrow and Bugis on Sunday. Simply can't wait.... Yippee! I don't want school to start....Argh!

made another new promise ][-
 and broke it again at 7:47 PM ;

 

__ Saturday, October 01, 2005 ;

Perhaps it's time I should let go of you. You'll not be back by my side no matter how long I wait for you. No matter how much tears or blood I lose because of you, we still can't be together. I will not cry for you anymore because my feelings are already numb, I can no longer feel the pain of losing you. I will bury these 3 years of feelings for you at the bottom of my heart, where no one can take away from me. Nobody will ever be able to replace you in my heart.
`53669-1314
I hope you'll be happy forever, no matter where you go...

Love is patient,
love is kind.
It is not jealous,
is not pompous,
it is not inflated,
it is not rude,
it does not seek its own interests,
it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth.
Love never fails.
-1 Corinthians 13-

made another new promise ][-
 and broke it again at 3:24 PM ;