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__ Sunday, November 27, 2005 ;

Went for TTB as well as 11am service today. Seriously did not like TTB man. Not that it isn't fun, just that maybe I'm not used to their way of worship lahz. Afterall, I've been attending the 11am service for months already. Can't really remember what Pastor Barnabas preached at the TTB service except for this sentence :"We worship to seek the Person of God and not seek experience. By seeking the Person of God, we gain experience." I think I'm guilty of only seeking the experience rather than wanting to seek God. Sometimes, I look forward to going to church because of the songs and worship instead of being able to be with God. Till now, I still can't feel God's presence around me. I don't feel peaceful and calm at all whenever I'm at service. Don't know what's wrong with me.Anyway, 11am service was nice! Truly enjoyed the songs and message Pastor Shih Ming talked about. I hope one day God will use me to be a blessing to others around me. Wished I had the opportunity to go for a mission trip too. Hm... went for e_God yesterday afternoon also. Was quite nice too. Had Holy Communion. I liked the station where we write out what is bothering us and ask God to help us overcome it. I truly believe God will intervene and put a stop to the crisis that I've been facing for so long. One day I'll get out of it... I trust the Lord.

This weekend has been a good time for me to rest and recharge. Will be going to work again tomorrow. Shall endure for another 3 more days of taping and detaping. After Wednesday, I really have to start on my studies. Homework lying on my desk untouched, J1 topics waiting for me to revise, and lots of newspapers for me to do review on. When will all these ever end? I seriously hate the thought of school reopening. I fear school. I don't want all the problems to come back when school starts again. Will I ever get to start anew? Or will I be scarred forever? I'm scared to go back to school. If only time stops ticking at this moment...

made another new promise ][-
 and broke it again at 4:53 PM ;