
__ Friday, October 14, 2005 ;
I feel so empty inside me. Seriously, I hate JC life. I don't even think I have a life currently. Everyday revolves around homework and exams. I feel so stressed up and depressed. Cut again.. I know I should stop it, I know it's a sin that God frowns upon, but I really am going to break down soon if I don't do it. At least, I can relieve some part of my stress and burden. I feel like giving up now. I hate this kind of life. I hate it when I have to drag my feet every morning to school. I hate it when I have to find all sorts of excuses just to be able to skip school. I hate it when I have to face the consequences of my badly done results. I hate it! I can't stand it anymore. Can't I return to the past? I used to love school so much... I loved studying, I loved interacting with people, and I loved myself. But now, I'm a totally different person. I don't even feel like speaking to anyone. Why have things turned out this way? Have I done anything wrong? Why is God torturing me like that?
made another new promise ][-
and broke it again at 6:38 PM ;